Campaign Texts Archive

[KidTDragon]

You're going to be getting grifty texts from "Trump" for years after he's dead.

 

[Stepwise]

It seems like the republicans send short little soundbytes in the hopes of a knee-jerk reaction, and the democrats send essays. Is that always the case, or am I misreading something?

 

[Ungnome]

Most voters don't understand nuance and have the attention span of a goldfish, so short soundbites work, unfortunately.

 

[CoffeeHorse]

Some Republican candidates also send the essays. It seems to be the standard way to do this, but Trump and his team didn't get the memo.

I'm not sure what's actually worse. Trump's are aggressive, weird, and sometimes downright creepy. But at least they're short. The essays don't look so bad when I type them out here, but they look ridiculous on a phone screen. So much scrolling. Plus the weird (No subject) thing. It's like they're meant for emails but they're getting blasted out to phones instead.

Alligator
Alcatraz

the Official Shirt is here.
Claim yours NOW:

-House GOP
10:25 AM

From Trump: If I say please, will you respond before my rally?

START INTERVIEW 7/3:
11:38 AM

Gone, tomorrow?

PRESIDENT TRUMP'S JULY 4TH MAGA HAT

Act now, or forever hold your peace:
3:44 PM

Did your dog eat your mail?

Trump: This is my FINAL PLEA before the biggest rally of the year.

JOIN RALLY BLITZ NOW:
5:36 PM

Right before I walk out...

I want to know: Are you still with me?

It's Trump.

JOIN THE MAGA BLITZ -
7:33 PM

From Trump: I know you love me.

That's why I'm extending my MAGA Rally Blitz just for you.

VIEW HERE:
9:54 PM

 

[CoffeeHorse]

From Trump: 2 seconds, please!

I won't waste your time.

You just need to hear one thing.

QUICK:
11:27 AM

Trump: Are you [CoffeeHorse]?

I just tried to call you.

Did you see my 4th of July message?
1:49 PM

Should illegals get your Social Security check?

Trump just unveiled a new Social Security plan...

LOOK:
4:27 PM

 

[CoffeeHorse]

Trump: [CoffeeHorse], [CoffeeHorse]!

Here's why I need you after July 4th.

My response to impeachment:
10:19 AM

NO TAX ON TIPS. NO TAX ON OVERTIME.

President Trump's MAGA bill is signed into law & Americans everywhere celebrate!

READ:
3:13 PM

 

[CoffeeHorse]

Trump: Is this [CoffeeHorse]?

I just tried to call your cell.

Here's what I needed to tell you:
10:12 AM

TRUMP: You're not afraid of being canceled by the left, are you?

I hope not, because they're going to HATE this >>
1:19 PM

TEST RESULTS FROM TRUMP!

I wanted to share them with [CoffeeHorse] first.

VIEW:
6:18 PM

I took the bait and clicked the link. I have to archive what the fundraising page says. It's a keeper.

TRUMP TEST RESULTS!

100% MAGA

100% AMERICA FIRST

100% THE HEALTHIEST PRESIDENT WHO HAS EVER LIVED!​

That's right. The doctors were amazed. Tremendous results. They've never seen numbers like this before - some are even calling them PERFECT.

BUT DO YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD MAKE TODAY EVEN BETTER?

Hearing from YOU through my only OFFICIAL Citizens Only Survey!

Now back to texts.

From Trump: If I say PLEASE, will you at least answer question #1?

It's the easiest question!

MAGA POLL IS OPEN:
8:23 PM

 

[CoffeeHorse]

[CoffeeHorse]?

It's President Trump. Have my texts been getting through?

CONFIRM HERE:
10:18 AM

[CoffeeHorse], do you want to speak one-on-one?

It's Trump, and I've got a few questions for you

Let's talk:
1:26 PM

 

[CoffeeHorse]

It's coming from inside the house!

Survey ID 16452447-484

This is a TRUMP ADMINISTRATION AUDIT:

-DJT
10:28 AM

Winner winner, chicken dinner.

Trump's Big Beautiful Bill passed!

BUT, there's still bad news...
4:00 PM

Pres Trump: Bad news...

Here are 3 reasons why I absolutely need you to chip in $10 today:
6:11 PM

[CoffeeHorse]: CASE 15-DJT-94713

I need you to fill this out. Now please!

- DJT
8:10 PM

 

[CoffeeHorse]

I want to make sure my messages to AMERICAN CITIZENS are getting through.

THIS IS A TEST FROM TRUMP.

Respond:
10:20 AM

Rudy Giuliani: No pardon. No lifeline. This is my Hail Mary.

Please read my final plea:

12:23 PM

MESSAGE FROM THE PRESIDENT ON SOCIAL SECURITY

These changes might affect you!

Here's what happened:
1:07 PM

AS SEEN IN THE WHITE HOUSE!

You just received VIP Access to our MAGA Summer Sale...

50% off Gulf of America hat:
4:23 PM

[CoffeeHorse]?
President Trump is checking in - is this your best number for emergency updates?

CONFIRM IMMEDIATELY:
6:11 PM

From Trump: TEMPORARY RESTRAINING ORDER ISSUED!

They're coming after me and MAGA.

Here's what happened:
8:13 PM

 

[CoffeeHorse]

From Trump: If I say PLEASE, will you at least answer question #1?

It's the easiest question!

MAGA POLL IS OPEN:
3:47 PM

Congratulations you're speaking to Donald Trump.

I love you, [CoffeeHorse]!

So here are 5 reasons to give $5:
4:02 PM

Hello [CoffeeHorse], this is a reminder for your upcoming interview with the President.

Your interview begins now:
6:02 PM

 

[CoffeeHorse]

From Trump: I wrote you a letter!

It's even got my signature at the bottom.

Please take a look:
10:29 AM

[CoffeeHorse]: PRESIDENT TRUMP IS TRYING TO REACH YOU!

He even left you a transcribed message.

READ:
1:11 PM

[CoffeeHorse]?

It's President Trump. Have my texts been getting through?

CONFIRM HERE:
5:48 PM

[CoffeHorse]: CASE 15-DJT-94713

I need you to fill this out. Now please!

- DJT
8:19 PM

 

[CoffeeHorse]

We've been looking everywhere for you

[CoffeeHorse], you made the cut for the Trump Gold Club!

ACCEPT:

- DJT
10:20 AM

Trump: Here's the truth

I can't meet this fundraising goal without YOU.

$10 PLEASE:
1:17 PM

MESSAGE FROM THE PRESIDENT ON SOCIAL SECURITY

These changes might definitely affect you!

Here's what happened:
3:46 PM

Might definitely.

 

[CoffeeHorse]

From Trump: Should I do this?

Send a lucky winner to Mar-A-Lago or Trump Tower?

IT COULD BE YOU:
10:03 AM

You're running out of time.

Trump: Only HOURS LEFT to accept your Sustaining Membership before my deadline.

ACCEPT:
2:10 PM

George Washington, MAGA?

Trump wants to know.

You decide:
5:26 PM

[CoffeeHorse]: CASE 15-DJT-94713

I need you to fill this out. Now please!

- DJT
6:50 PM

 

[CoffeeHorse]

Hello honest resident: your interview with President Trump begins now.

Hurry!

SECURE TRUMP PORTAL:
10:41 AM

Trump: Hot-blooded hellraiser

My deadline for you is 11:59 TONIGHT...

ANSWER TRUMP:
8:18 PM

I guess I was in a mood earlier today.

 

[CoffeeHorse]

Did you wake up feeling lucky?

Your number just got called!

TRUMP SPECIAL OFFER:
10:17 AM

CONGRATS!

It's Trump. You just won the Gold Medal in Trump World!

TAKE A LOOK:
1:11 PM

 

[abates]

I knew it, we are all trapped in Trump World.

 

[The Mighty Mollusk]

Never a Death Star around when you need one.

 

[CoffeeHorse]

To CONFIRM & VERIFY your Trump status, do we have your Zip Code correct?

MISSING

Securely Confirm

-DJT
10:23 AM

[CoffeeHorse]: CASE 15-DJT-94713

I need you to fill this out. Now please!

- DJT
4:08 PM

Trump: Biggest Scandal in History?

I just fired a warning shot!

READ NOW:
5:57 PM

MESSAGE FROM THE PRESIDENT ON SOCIAL SECURITY

These changes might definitely affect you!

Here's what happened:
8:04 PM

 

[CoffeeHorse]

Do you hate it when I ask for money?

-DJT

So here are 4 reasons to give $5:
10:23 AM

If you were expecting the reasons to be normal fundraising spam stuff like "We're being outraised" or "We're going to miss our goal", ha ha that is not how this works.

1. Time is running out. Donating through this link automatically gets you on my brand new TRUMP PATRIOT OF HONOR LIST!
2. I hear JD Vance wants to hand the list to me as soon as he's back in the White House. Maybe we'll hang the list up somewhere, so everyone can see your name on it.
3. If you donate right now, your name will be on the top of the list!
4. Everyone who donates right now is entered to win the ONLY SET OF TRUMP GOLD GOLF BALLS available in the world. They have the Trump signature!

[CoffeeHorse], have you checked your inbox lately?

GOP leaders are trying to get in touch with you!

Here's why:
12:27 PM

Hello [CoffeeHorse], this is a reminder for your upcoming interview with the President.

Your interview begins now:
1:28 PM