I managed to not cuss her out over it and the next day it turned out better than I expected. Apparently, the fact that she knew I was thinking about changing my name and hadn't told her yet what it was made her think I was planning something weird. When in fact, I was just embarrassed and not wanting to commit yet. She actually likes "Ashley". Now, if I DID want to do something weird that would still be my right, but at least that's not actually the problem.
The whole idea you or I might "confuse" people is so stupid. If a kid doesn't realize they're gay or trans or whatever until they meet someone who is, they were all the time and just didn't realize it. We don't have cooties, this isn't contagious. And keeping people in denial and ignorant just makes things more painful.
Oh that is awesome that that went that way. I love it (kinda-sorta) when I make it such a big thing in my own head then other people surprise you by making it not such a big thing. It’s what happened with my brother. I called him in the morning, told him I had something to tell him later in the evening; he thought I’d killed someone and needed the body cleaned up, or a sperm donor (not touching that second one
), but when I told him that I was transitioning, what he said was, “Oh, that’s it?” Damn near brought me to (happy) tears. Or.... ok, it did.
YAAS! THANK YOU! I’ve been tying to nail the bigotry trope my in-laws were exuding for MONTHS now. Yes, that is exactly what they think; that my queerness is a contagious disease. Assholes. This is personhood that comes from within for MANY people; it’s only society with people like them that deams it “inappropriate” why we all have to hide it until it’s safer to come out.