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@  Bass X0 : (20 May 2019 - 11:16 AM)

SEND THE BOOKS!!

@  Cybersnark : (20 May 2019 - 08:52 AM)

So, now that Game of Thrones is over, when can we get back to The Dragon Prince?

@  unluckiness : (20 May 2019 - 12:19 AM)

Like, half of them nowadays are montages of tweet screencaps from the writer's inbox

@  unluckiness : (20 May 2019 - 12:18 AM)

lol you expected integrity from internet news

@  fourteenwings : (19 May 2019 - 11:33 PM)

I'm mostly confused how news sites went from "Analysing all the amazingness of Game of Thrones" to "Fans sure don't like this season!", like... way to prioritize clicks over a solid editorial opinion

@  fourteenwings : (19 May 2019 - 11:30 PM)

[and there's a recurring setting of a "derelict industrial site"] is this like the Toei Quarry?

@  MEDdMI : (19 May 2019 - 11:17 PM)

@Foffy and then that giant lasagna just tipped over and killed everyone, to be later known as the infamous Bad Monday event.

@  SHIELD Agent 47 : (19 May 2019 - 10:59 PM)

Ahahaha!!! Go read the reactions for yourself. To say anything more here risks spoiling the finale for subscribing Allsparkers, the quality of this season notwithstanding.

@  Foffy : (19 May 2019 - 10:59 PM)

pretty wild how heathcliff was in the game of thrones finale, i was not expecting that crossover

@  TM2-Megatron : (19 May 2019 - 10:48 PM)

were they still super pissed?

@  SHIELD Agent 47 : (19 May 2019 - 10:48 PM)

Well, as someone who is not into Game of Thrones, it sure was entertaining to open up social media this evening to unexpectedly see headlines about fan reactions to the finale. Lmao.

@  Nevermore : (19 May 2019 - 06:12 PM)

But it's also a SUPER-well known location in my region, so these extensive exterior shots without any post production alterations completely ruin the illusion for me.

@  Nevermore : (19 May 2019 - 06:11 PM)

I mean, I get why they did it: It's an existing location that fits the purpose, it's open for the public, and they had to shoot some scenes in my home state anyway to due a subsidizing deal.

@  Nevermore : (19 May 2019 - 06:09 PM)

Needless to say, it's not in Berlin, and even what's seen onscreen is waaaaay too modern for something that's supposed to exist in 1929 (even moreso as a derelict site in 1929). The structures seen haven't even been built until the 1960s!

@  Nevermore : (19 May 2019 - 06:07 PM)

I'm currently in the process of watching season 2 of Babylon Berlin, and there's a recurring setting of a "derelict industrial site" or whatever it's supposed to be on the show, and I easily recognize it as a place only a few minutes from where I live (it's actually a former ironworks site that's been turned into a public park).

@  Xellos : (19 May 2019 - 05:52 PM)

Ever since I went to Japan last year, I have friend who dread watching anime with me due to that...

@  Xellos : (19 May 2019 - 05:51 PM)

Not hugely, but I am the type to notice places once I have been there and say "Hey, I've been there!"

@  wonko the sane? : (19 May 2019 - 05:50 PM)

Half of new york city (on tape.) is actually montreal.

@  TM2-Megatron : (19 May 2019 - 05:50 PM)

I watched Death Wish 5 last night and clearly recognized Toronto streets; didn't pull me out of Bronson's 1-man war on drugs or fashion or whatever it was that pissed him off that time

@  TM2-Megatron : (19 May 2019 - 05:49 PM)

it's nice to finally be thought of as exotic by somebody! lol

@  Nevermore : (19 May 2019 - 05:48 PM)

In an "I cannot possibly make my brain ignore the location I'm familiar with and pretend it's whatever the story claims it is" way?

@  Nevermore : (19 May 2019 - 05:42 PM)

Question for those of you living in exotic locations such as the US or the UK: If you watch a movie or a TV show that features a real-life location as a stand-in for someplace else, and you recognize the real-life location due to having been there in person, does that pull you out of the story?

@  Xellos : (19 May 2019 - 05:15 PM)

Maybe you should have installed macOS in your house instead.

@  Noideaforaname : (19 May 2019 - 04:40 PM)

Nothing like coming home after a long day to find a bird in the house. And then once you sit down for a well-earned rest after leading the bird back outside, you find it had a friend. A friend who *really* doesn't understand how windows work...

@  PlutoniumBoss : (19 May 2019 - 01:26 PM)

Bingo. The big polls don't tell people what's actually happening because that doesn't sell.

@  fourteenwings : (19 May 2019 - 10:59 AM)

IIRC there are good polls but data is easily manipulated so they give people what they want to hear

@  wonko the sane? : (19 May 2019 - 10:58 AM)

The only way to get people interested in politics is to make into reality TV. So they lie to do it.

@  PlutoniumBoss : (19 May 2019 - 01:38 AM)

Yeah, polling these days is garbage.

@  Sean Whitmore : (18 May 2019 - 11:53 PM)

Well, he was an honest man. He wasn’t gonna lie to a 5-year-old.

@  Paladin : (18 May 2019 - 08:34 PM)

Grandfather once said to me, "I'm going upstairs and hug your grandma."

@  Sabrblade : (18 May 2019 - 07:08 PM)

Mama always said that you can tell a lot 'bout a person from 'is shoes...

@  TheMightyMol... : (18 May 2019 - 03:54 PM)

Life is like a box of chocolates. Stay out of the sun or melt into a pile of gross slop.

@  wonko the sane? : (18 May 2019 - 10:26 AM)

Greasy, disappointing and still managing to be over priced?

@  Lancer : (18 May 2019 - 10:22 AM)

... Yes, it is!

@  Noideaforaname : (18 May 2019 - 09:48 AM)

Life's a fillet of fish!

@  unluckiness : (18 May 2019 - 08:53 AM)

ow the edge

@  Paladin : (18 May 2019 - 07:03 AM)

a reminder that life is an unrepentant hellscape where everyone & everything you know will eventually betray you.

@  Pennpenn : (18 May 2019 - 06:45 AM)

You know, this election is what has finally broken me of any confidence at any point of pre-polling data. I mean, it's always been sketchy, but this is just... aaaargh!

@  Pennpenn : (18 May 2019 - 06:08 AM)

I was going to make an Auspol election thread in P&R, but the outcome so far has made me feel physically ill.

@  Gamma V : (18 May 2019 - 03:28 AM)

Haven't been here in a long time.

@  Pennpenn : (18 May 2019 - 03:16 AM)

I have heard that, it's rather disappointing. Ah, maybe they'll just leech each others stores of "awful racist vote" and not go anywhere.

@  Trpodeca : (17 May 2019 - 11:09 PM)

I voted. Boy there are a worrying amount of parties which sound like fascists.

@  Pennpenn : (17 May 2019 - 06:55 PM)

For those in Australia, it is a federal election today. Go Vote! It's Mandatory!

@  TheMightyMol... : (17 May 2019 - 04:19 PM)

Humor? I 'ardly know 'or!

@  wonko the sane? : (17 May 2019 - 03:51 PM)

I was intemately familiar with humour... but she just wanted to be friends...

@  Maximus Ambus : (17 May 2019 - 12:10 PM)

BZT Time out! Time out! Time ooooooouuuuuut!!!

@  unluckiness : (17 May 2019 - 08:23 AM)

Yes. Are you familiar with humor?

@  Sabrblade : (17 May 2019 - 07:50 AM)

You are familiar with The Room, yes?

@  unluckiness : (17 May 2019 - 01:14 AM)

nah, tuxedos are formal wear

@  Sabrblade : (16 May 2019 - 10:38 PM)

*...while dressed in a tuxedo*


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* * * * * 5 votes

The Official Unofficial Allspark Transgender Thread: Everyone is welcome!

transgender gender identity

2441 replies to this topic

#1 Kira Kira

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Posted 01 July 2014 - 11:28 PM

EDIT (5/12/2016): Just want to make a disclaimer that some of the information and ideas about gender I presented in the early posts in this thread are out of date, and frankly, embarrassing to me. ( > . < ) (like I think I spoke of gender and sex as separate concepts, which is such a gender 101 shortcut, bleh)
So feel free to use this info as a base of you want, but after that I'd say to seek out more complete and updated resources out there! (tumblr has tons lol)

That's that. :)

ORIGINAL TEXT:
I've had the idea for a thread like this for a while and after all the trans related discussion in the Botcon superthread I thought now would be a good time.
So here we are!
This thread exists as a place for transgender and cisgender Allsparkers alike to discuss transgender topics, including the basics, transition stuff, amd whatever comes to mind really.
What this thread needs to stay away from is religion and politics, be it pro-transgender individuals or against them. There's a subforum for stuff like that!

I figure the best way to start is to just sort of talk about who I am, what I'm going through right now, stuff like that.
I've been on hormone replacement therapy (HRT) for 6 months now. (I've identified as female for a long time, and have been living part time as a woman sine 2006-ish... I'll have to share more about all that another time) So, HRT is an integral part of transitioning for most trans people, and is what causes the body to change into something that is more congruent with our sense of self. What trans women such as myself take are an estrogen and a testosterone blocker. I'm taking a bioidentical estrogen, which is basically the same chemical as the hormones that cisgender women make, but created in a lab. Science!
Ok, so basically after this long the changes that are happening to my body are pretty apparent, which is cool. It's often described as a second puberty and that's the truest way I can describe it. It's wonderful, but sometimes awkward. And just like puberty it takes time for all the changes to take full effect.
And what changes are that, you might ask? Well all the secondary sex characteristics: breasts, more fat on the hips/thighs/butt, softer skin, thicker head hair, body hair turns vellus,etc. A trans woman's body odor changes as well, becoming more, um, feminine. And there's changes in the pheremones too. Basically HRT makes a lot of changes to the body (the way hormones control the body is fascinating!) Things that don't change are bone structure, facial hair, and voice, although if a trans girl transitions before puberty or during it voice deepening, beards, and bone growth can be avoided!
Oh, and the HRT also changes the libido and stops spontaneous erections. Which is very convenient, lol

There are also mental changes but those are much harder to quantify... It's hard to judge what are actual changes and what is from having a body that better fits the mind. But both happen.

I feel like there are a million other things I want to discuss, but I guess just discussing the physical aspects ia enough to begin with.
Please everyone join in with you question, insights, stories, whatever! Whether you are trans yourself, or a supporter, or just curious, let's make this thread a fun and interesting place!

Edited by Kira Kira, 12 May 2016 - 02:13 PM.

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#2 2019

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Posted 01 July 2014 - 11:41 PM

I admit I've always been curious about the facial hair thing. Ever since I heard it still grows after HRT I gained a lot of respect for my trans friends' ability to make it all dissappear so cleanly, considering how my male friends seem to suddenly bush up in 48 hours.


PM me if you're bored!


#3 Kira Kira

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Posted 01 July 2014 - 11:45 PM

Usually a girl will get laser hair removal or electrolysis at some point, unless she wants to keep shaving forever. Until then it's shaving, make up, and luck!
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#4 2019

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Posted 01 July 2014 - 11:50 PM

Oh right, silly me.

 

Laser isn't 100% though is it, it leaves about 20% of hair follicles or something.


PM me if you're bored!


#5 Kira Kira

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Posted 01 July 2014 - 11:54 PM

Yeah, it takes multiple treatments over time I hear...
Eventually the hair gives up, I guess? Ha.

Edited by Kira Kira, 01 July 2014 - 11:54 PM.

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#6 Cheetimus Primal

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Posted 01 July 2014 - 11:59 PM

I don't have questions at the moment because I'm exhausted but I am so very glad you've started this. I want to learn more and I hope others feel the same.

 

 

Oh, here's a question: Do you listen to Keith and The Girl?


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#7 Kira Kira

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Posted 02 July 2014 - 12:05 AM

Thanks! I hope everyone does too.

And nope, I had to look them up. Should I be listening?
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#8 MrBlud

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Posted 02 July 2014 - 12:07 AM

Something I've not quite grasped is the whole "transgender" thing.

 

I used to think there were two sexes. Male and Female. A transgender person was someone transitioning either from Male-to-Female or Female-to-Male. Is this not the case? Is a Transgender person someone who simply isn't their born sex even if they don't decide to have therapy or so on to transition?


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#9 Cheetimus Primal

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Posted 02 July 2014 - 12:08 AM

The Girl, Chemda, is engaged to a Transgender man named Lauren. It's different int hat he is still outwardly female but identifies male, keeping his birth name and all. Listening to him on the podcast helped me understand things I didn't know existed like phantom feelings of body parts that aren't there and never have been.

 

They do an amazing show and are very informative on a great many things, especially gender issues.


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#10 Princess Viola

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Posted 02 July 2014 - 12:32 AM

Something I've not quite grasped is the whole "transgender" thing.

 

I used to think there were two sexes. Male and Female. A transgender person was someone transitioning either from Male-to-Female or Female-to-Male. Is this not the case? Is a Transgender person someone who simply isn't their born sex even if they don't decide to have therapy or so on to transition?

Basically a transgender person is anyone who's gender identity or gender expression doesn't match someone's assigned sex based upon their physical parts.

 

So for example, I'm transgender because I identify as a female even though I'm 100% biologically male and haven't started HRT or anything.

 

Or someone who is biologically female but identifies as both male and female would be transgender as well.

 

And other things too.


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#11 Kira Kira

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Posted 02 July 2014 - 12:41 AM

Something I've not quite grasped is the whole "transgender" thing.
 
I used to think there were two sexes. Male and Female. A transgender person was someone transitioning either from Male-to-Female or Female-to-Male. Is this not the case? Is a Transgender person someone who simply isn't their born sex even if they don't decide to have therapy or so on to transition?

You're basically right (although there are other less common sexes, like intersex people)... The physical change isn't what makes a person transgender, but rather their identifying as a different sex than they were born. That's why sometimes people use transsexual to refer to a transgender person who is actually transition and changing their bodies and such. Even trans people tend to muddle those two terms at times so I hope you don't mind that I don't delve into the nuances.
But in general if someone says they are transgender it's usually safe to assume they want to transition at some point.

The Girl, Chemda, is engaged to a Transgender man named Lauren. It's different int hat he is still outwardly female but identifies male, keeping his birth name and all. Listening to him on the podcast helped me understand things I didn't know existed like phantom feelings of body parts that aren't there and never have been.
 
They do an amazing show and are very informative on a great many things, especially gender issues.

Oh, wow that's cool. Especially to have a unique transgender POV.
Honestly I couldn't see doing what Lauren is doing (or not doing), but more power to him!
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#12 Aida Mana-Sue

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Posted 02 July 2014 - 01:27 AM

I'm neutrois (Still feels weird to type) and I was born with a male body. Growing up, I never really enjoyed male company (Apart from my best friend, who I fell in love with) and I always felt uncomfortable being told I had to be more masculine or fit in with the 'lads'.

 

I'd never really seriously questioned my gender identity until a few years ago when II made a few transgender friends I have the utmost respect for (My sexual identity I'd finally figured out a few years previous). Once I'd started questioning, though, I wasn't able to stop. I feel unhappy in my body a lot of the time, but I've never really considered HRT. I actually feel a bit uncomfortable typing this (And talking about my own LGBT issues in general) because I trivialize my own gender identity and believe it's just not worth talking about compared to friends who have gender dysphoria so bad they suffer from chronic depression. I know it's actually counterproductive to think like that, but I really do worry that my issues are 'silly' in comparison.

 

I also worry/think I prefer thinking of myself as female compared to male because that's simply further from where I started. That I might be having these same issues from the opposite perspective if I was born with a female body.

 

I'm sorry I don't really have anything to add to the thread at the moment, but I've always been very interested in learning more about LGBT culture and people, so I'll be following and see if I can contribute.

 

I prefer the personal pronoun 'She' (Non binary pronouns are just not for me) but I'm so used to 'He' that really it's not a big deal.

 

So, uh, I hope that made some sense. It's very late and I'm having quite a poorly night.


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#13 Kira Kira

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Posted 02 July 2014 - 02:24 AM

Thanks for sharing, especially since you feel uncomfortable about it. I know it's hard to work through tough stuff like that but it's almost always worth it!

I don't think you should feel bad just because your friends feel the dysphoria and you aren't. Each of us is different and your identity is just as valid as everyone else's.
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#14 Verity Carlo

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Posted 02 July 2014 - 02:25 AM

I've always felt uncomfortable in my own body, but it wasn't until around fall last year that I fully realized that I'm trans. (thanks, Kira, by the way, you were a big help in letting myself realizing that.) I haven't gotten on HRT yet or told my parents, because I'm scared they won't accept me for who I am (I live with a bunch of fundies), but I've slowly been coming out to my friends and at least one of my family members (My aunt). And they've helped me when I've been depressed, and my aunt said she'd be able to be there to back me up for when I'm going to tell my parents. I'm kinda hoping to come out somewhere in the next year, and I'm ready to get rid of this stupid body as soon as possible, but I'm still kind of nervous.

 

Anyway, that's my brief history. I'm kinda tired right now, and I don't have anything else to say that Kira and others haven't said already, but I'll be sure to chime in on any questions or anything.


 

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#15 Kira Kira

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Posted 02 July 2014 - 02:35 AM

You're welcome kiddo! ( > u ^ )
I like playing big sister/mother, so I like to help when I can.

It's really huge that you have someone like an aunt on your side. That should really help when you come out to the 'rents! Any support is good, but a family member of a similar age to them is def going to make them realize that this isn't just some joke or fad to you, and who you see and something you need to do.

I think everyone in this thread is tired and should be sleeping, me including me. Ha.
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#16 Maruten

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Posted 02 July 2014 - 03:58 AM

I think this thread is really, really fantastic because this is an important issue that so many people are just completely unaware of. There are so many people out there who just don't know this is a thing, and who innocently say hurtful or ignorant things not out of prejudice but just because they don't understand.

I'm terrified of gender politics of all varieties because even the simplest aspects can be hugely complex and subjective, and I just don't feel qualified to participate in discussions about that stuff. I think I'm slightly more educated than many because I have a close friend who's a trans woman, and seeing her courage on the path towards transition has been an inspiration and a privilege. But one of the main things I've learned is that human identity is so much more complex than most people realise and there's always more to learn.

Any endeavour that spreads information and fosters understanding is a wonderful thing.

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#17 Cat

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Posted 02 July 2014 - 04:16 AM

I don't think I've ever been happier to see a thread title before.

 

This is a great topic, and I love that already it's clear that there is a hell of a lot of love and support for you all.



#18 Esser-Z

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Posted 02 July 2014 - 05:26 AM

I've struggled with gender issues myself, though I've come to the conclusion I'm male enough to not bother changing my body. I'm also dating a transwoman, and have an unexpectedly high number of trans friends. All in all, I don't have too much to learn I feel, but I'm VERY glad this thread is here! :)



#19 FortMax

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Posted 02 July 2014 - 07:57 AM

I figured out I was trans just over two weeks ago. It feels like my subconscious has known for at least 15 years, though. I remember having If I Had Animorph Powers daydreams that often ended with me getting stuck in a girl form.
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#20 StarSaber

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Posted 02 July 2014 - 10:00 AM

Kira,

You said that you only live as a female PT. Are there outside social or professional factors that prevent you from living as your actual gender FT?

If not, living only PT just seems like crossdressing to me since you haven't completely rejected living as your physical sex and seems contrary to what I know about transgenderism.

If this is getting too personal, just let me know.

-SS



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