So here's my entry for the challenge. It's set in the Shattered Glass Universe, and there are some minor spoilers for the club-exclusive text story Dungeons & Dinobots.

Also, I have to thank Caboose from here at The Allspark for taking the time and effort to proofread this for me.

Shattered Glass: Retrieving a Story

Main Processor-Online
ERROR- Recent upgrade(B-495) failed to reach circuits on 15 distinct levels
Exo-structural restriction detected
Attempting to restore functionality…

Two red lights weakly flickered to life. Acting as the optic sensors to a moderate sized Cybertronian, they slowly moved side to side within a dark room. The mech was trying to take in his surroundings.

He was a fairly average looking bot, with large wheels on his shoulders and a combination of greens and grays for color. A blocky purple symbol adorned his chest.

The mech tried to move his arm forward, but was unable. He was currently bolted onto a large metal bench, one in a row of three.Trying to focus his optics on the other benches, the mech made a horrible discovery. There were other bots on the benches to his left and right, neither of them still living, if their colorless appearances were any indication.

A few feet in front of the bot stood a small table, covered with several tools and other various items, their purposes unknown.

‘Where am I?’, the Cybertronian wondered to himself.

Several metallic noises attracted the mech’s attention. Footsteps. Another bot was here.

Another Cybertronian strolled into the room. This bot was primarily blue, gray, and copper in color, and had a purple symbol on his shoulder identical to the one on the captive bot’s chest.

“Hello there”, the newcomer greeted, pausing briefly, “Kup, was it?”.

The captive bot, Kup, violently shook on the metal bench. ‘Why am I in here, what’s going on?’, he thought to himself

The second mech simply stared at Kup, tilting his head slightly to the side.

Kup was visibly angered, but he still said nothing

“Silent, eh? The name’s Wheeljack, and you’re here for a very good reason.”, the second bot, Wheejack calmly stated.

Kup paused himself before responding, his optics brightening. ‘Wheeljack, that crazy scientist that Prime tried to get rid of a while ago?’, he thought to himself.

“But that’s not important right now”, Wheeljack swiftly remarked, ”since I now have a chance to display my true genius! That foolish Optimus Prime will pay for the shame he caused me.”

‘What is that crazy bot rambling about?’, Kup questioned to himself.

“That moronic Optimus had the gall to call me crazy! Me, me, of all bots! Can you believe that, because I can’t believe that!”, answered Wheeljack, his tone of voice randomly changing.

“I’ll show him my true genius! And all I need is a little something from your memory, you participated in The Draxyl Event about 5000 vorns ago right?” Wheeljack continued.

Kup looked shocked for a moment, and immediately regretted it.

“Great, excellent! It was hard enough to find you, with those constant upgrades and reformattings you put yourself through I could barely believe how old you really were, and I didn’t even stand a chance when it came to recognizing you.”, Wheeljack rambled.

Kup remained silent, he couldn’t say anything at all. He had his pride and duty as a recon agent. He merely held his head up and darkened his optics, trying to show an outward sign of resistance.

“Oh, your cooperation won’t be a problem, no matter how resistant you attempt to act”, Wheeljack retorted, picking up two items from the table, the pair of them unrecognizable to Kup. “I may not even need your ember still around if all goes well.”, he finished.

With one of the instruments taken from the table, Wheeljack turned it until a small dish on one end pointed in Kup’s direction. Pressing a button on the item, it emitted a strange noise for but a few moments, and Kup’s optic sensors instantly went dark.

“Gotta love those EMP generators”, Wheeljack muttered to himself.

Walking up to Kup, Wheeljack turned the smaller bot’s head to the side and opened a small panel on it‘s surface. Taking the second apparatus, he inserted it into a slot within the panel on Kup’s head.

“Bet you’ve got a ton of war stories in this old processor of yours.”, Wheeljack muttered, laughing slightly afterwards.

Pausing where he stood, Wheeljack allowed the device to send him a copy of Kup’s memory tracks.

-5000 vorns from Current time

“Okay, so, does everyone understand the mission parameters?”, a fairly large white and brown mech asked, a look of boredom clearly evident on his silver faceplate.

“All aspects of the mission are clear commander Landshark!”, two other bots quickly responded at once.

Landshark seemed to barely respond, his rolling optics masked by a large blue visor, “Great, great, now Kup, Flak, we need to go over our attack stra-”

“Why do we need a scrappin’ strategy anyways, I say we just go in and blow those stinkin’ Decepticons straight to the Rad Zone!”, a similarly large mech of yellow and brown, Flak, interjected.

“We need some kind of plan. Just listen to the commander and you’ll get to blow up everything in sight once we arrive at our destination.”, flatly proclaimed Kup

Landshark resumed speaking, “As I was saying, we need to work on our strategy. The ‘cons are supposedly studying some random planet in the Draxyl system’s biological life forms, but we think they may be storing Energon rods in a secure location. I say we just land on the planet, blow up any locations confirmed to not hold Energon, and rip some embers out. Any obj-

ERROR: Could not recover desired track 2x-0017 through 2x-0019.9

Fire and fractured metal were everywhere. The three Autobots stood outside of the wrecked remains of what was once their ship, The Magna Power-003.

Landshark looked up at the pile of metal, his optics blinking every few moments underneath his visor. “Well, I expected we would crash, but at least we made it to the assigned planet, even if we did waste the only ship the higher-ups had. I guess we’ll just have to take whatever the Decepticon’s used to get here.”

“Would now be an appropriate time to attack the Decepticons, sir?”, Kup questioned.

“Good a time as any I guess.”, Landshark answered.

“Yeah, let’s rip their embers out and feed ‘em to them!”, Flak Yelled

“Yeah, that’s fine,”, Landshark stated, ”Anything goes against them, ripping out Sparks, torture, explosives. But there is also a chance we’re underestimating them and we’ll all end up scrapped on this dirt ball of a planet.”, he said in his typical bored tone.
Kup and Flak simply looked at him dully, their optics blinking.

Before anybody could respond, an incredible sound pierced the surrounding air. A massive roar, it’s source was unknown, but it was unlike anything the group of Autobots had ever heard.

ERROR: Could not recover desired track 2x-0021 through 2x-0024.5

A blocky, blue, mechanical arm stretched out. In place of a hand there was merely a black claw, the claw reached into another mass of metal and violently pulled something out, an ember casing. It’s previous owner, an unidentified Decepticon, was now nothing more than a pile of gray metal at Kup’s feet

“Pretty useful tool you have there Kup.”, Landshark complimented.

Kup stayed silent.

“That’s what they get for tryin’ to ambush us.”, Flak proclaimed, sending a few rounds into a surrounding corpse.

“At any rate, that noise was a bit disconcerting,”, Kup said. “Maybe that means the ‘con’s weren’t lying and they really are studying the wildlife. There may not be any Energon.”

Landshark seemed to think this over a bit, “Even so, killing all the ‘cons on this planet should at least give the Autobots a small advantage and yield us some information on possible Decepticon plots and tactics.”

“If those endo-less ‘cons even have anything like that.”, Flak added.


“True.”

ERROR: Could not recover desired track 2x-0026.5 through 2x-0027.3

“Get it offa me!”, Flak yelled with the creature nearly stuck on his back.

“How many are there?!”, Landshark yelled.

“We--

ERROR: Could not recover desired track 2x-0027.46 through 2x-0027.47

The strange organic creatures had the Autobots surrounded. Each of them was fairly large even when compared to the Cybertronians, with scales, teeth, and horns being their only notable features. Some of them quadrupedal and others somewhere near bipedal.

Flak had sustained some damage from one of the beasts attacking him, consisting of several panels missing from his back and a couple of large scratches across the chest. “These things are tougher’n they look.” Flak commented.

“Or perhaps you’re just easily beaten.” Kup suggested. His optics darkened suddenly in pain, half of his right arm was missing from an attack from one of the beasts.

“Mute it bots, and help me get rid of these things before they scrap us.” Landshark ordered.

One of the animals charged forward on four short legs, the multiple horns on it’s head aimed at the huddled Cybertronians. As it ran, Flak grabbed its head and barely lifted it off the ground. He threw the animal at one of the others standing nearby.

Kup replaced his claw hand attachment with a hammer and ran toward a long-necked animal.

Landshark’s vehicle mode trailer lifted into the air and attached to his back. A cannon and hook cable moved over his shoulders, and large treads moved over his arms. “It’s such a pain to use this form and so much fuel.” he complained.

Kup transformed to vehicle mode and rammed one of the creatures while Landshark struck two at once with his massive arms from his new form, Flak deployed extra missile launchers and a rifle on his arms, shooting in apparently random directions.

A few flight capable creatures flew overhead, but were quickly shot down by Flak.

Landshark stopped, his armor falling off of him, “Well, they’re pretty easy to take out, but these organic… things make a bit of a mess.” he said, stepping over various remains. “Flak, torch whatever is left.”, he commanded.

“Sure thing boss.” Flak complied.

Kup converted back to robot mode,”Alright now we need to find the Dece-

ERROR: Could not recover desired track 2x-0033.1 through 2x-0036.5

“This ship doesn’t look like much, are you sure we can use this”, Flak observed.

“I know, but it will still be useful for leaving this place. And this was the only Cybertronian alloy within monitoring distance of our sensors”, Landshark answered.

The trio of Autobots started to enter the ship.

Three Decepticons were inside the ship‘s central deck. “So the equipment from within the shuttle is having adverse effects on the Dinosaurs?” a large bluish-gray colored Decepticon asked.

“Looks like it, Banzai-tron.”, a slightly smaller gray and blue winged bot with dark camouflage stated.

“Well, it looks like the sooner we leave the better, and once we get back we’ll be able to share all this wonderful information about the indigenous life forms.”, Banzai-tron responded.

Another mech joined, “I am worried about the group that tried to go after the Autobots, We should have tried harder to stop them!” the gray and purple Cybertronian yelled.

“We have to take the situation more seriously though, the Autobots could be coming to us for more.” the gray and blue Decepticon offered.

“Leozack, I regret it deeply, but I don’t think I could have stopped Skyquake and the others if I tried.” Banzai-Tron stated somberly.

The entire group paused and looked downward, thinking of their fallen comrades.

“I hate tah break up this touching moment…” Flak’s voice alerted them,”…maybe. But this’ll be more fun for us if you run!”

“Hooligan, Leozack! RUN!” Banzai-tron yelled.

The blue and gray bot, Hooligan, looked back at him,”But Banz--”

“Just go Hooligan! Survive, go with Leozack!” Banzai-tron pleaded.

The two Decepticon jets nodded and headed toward an exit, soon finding their path blocked by Kup and Landshark.

“It was hard enough to find this ship’s central deck, and now you had to make it more troublesome by telling them to run?”, Landshark questioned.

Flak laughed and Kup merely looked annoyed.

“Sorry ‘bout that boss, I’ll catch ‘em.”, Flak said.

Landshark shrugged and allowed the Autobots to pass by in their jet modes. Flak assumed his vehicle form of a fairly large yellow missile launcher tank and slowly followed them.

“Please, call your troop off.”, Banzai-tron begged. “You can do whatever you want to me, just don’t injure those two!”

“Sorry, it’s kind of a pain, but duty is duty mech.”, Landshark stated, lifting Banzai-tron by the shoulder and slamming him against the wall. “Kup, use the lock.”

Kup walked forward and focused on something on his left ‘hand’, which was currently free of any sort attachments. An orange beam of light shot from it and hit Banzai-tron.

The Decepticon paused momentarily and involuntarily transformed into a large gray water-faring vehicle.

“We’ll take this guy back to Cybertron and pull some information out of him.” Landshark said.

Several loud banging noises came to the attention of all present. “Start up the ship, launch!”, Flak yelled.

“Why the hurry?”, Kup asked.

“Turn on the vis-screen AFTER you start up the ship!” He barked.

Landshark activated the proper systems to launch the ship and then activated the vis-screen.

The two unaware Autobots couldn’t believe their optic sensors, somewhere outside the ship stood two of the organic monsters, Dinosaurs according to the Decepticons. They were much, much larger than any of the others seen, with massive legs and diminutive arms, one of them with several large horns on its head.

One of them roared, the sound was identical to the unidentified noise earlier, the other soon joined it.

“Launch!” Landshark yelled.

ERROR: Could Not--

ERROR: ____-----

ER---

Data Tracks Viewing Complete

“Perfect, excellent!”, Wheeljack exclaimed. “But wow, that processor of his was a mess!”

“Anyway, the recorded movements of the organic creatures will be perfect for the A.I. systems!”

Unidentified later date

The A.I. installation was finally completed.

“Now, rise, my Dinobots! Show this world what true genius is!” Wheeljack commanded, cackling madly.

A low growling noise was present throughout the entire building. Several pairs of red lights instantly activated.

Good story, by the way, I enjoyed it.

Holy crap that was cool!

I really dig the "error, could not retrieve" bit. It underlines the fact that this is an alien race we're talking about - where the human brain will often lose short-term memory first, it makes sense for the Cybertronian "brain" to lose long-term memory first as files degrade over time.

And I'm pretty much unfamiliar with the SG universe, but I love how Wheeljack is so twisted and yet still sounds so much like Wheeljack.

Wow, I didn't expect such positive reactions. Thanks! This is my first TF fic so I thought I'd get a lot of critiques and suggestions. This isn't exactly a bad alternative though.


Oh yeah, I never decided if I wanted the memory damage to be a result of Kup's age, or just a side effect of the constant upgrading. Maybe both factored into that a bit.

I also like to think that more important events would stay within the memory longer. Sort of like if a Cybertronian let their automatic systems "clean up" their memory a bit, the less notable entries would be the first to go.


Really? For some reason I wasn't very satisfied with most of Wheeljack's dialogue. I think maybe because I didn't have a chance to re-read any of his dialogue in Dungeons & Dinobots for reference.

That reminds me, I did want to include a quick joke about one of G1 Wheeljack's infamous problems, but I forgot about it. Maybe next time.

One last thing. thanks a bunch for the positive reviews everybody.

Only too happy to compliment such good work!

On the subject of the memory errors...I'm thinking it could also be a result of battle damage. I mean, Kup's been through so many battles and wars, and you know he's taken more than his fair share of damages to his cranial unit. Possibly some of the 'lost memories' could be a direct result of either direct physical damages (IE bullets, blades or bashing which could literally snap the memory circuits and chips) or possible overloads blowing out ciircuits as his systems desperately scramble to keep him operational. (Like if he got shot with a particle beam and the shock of massive systems damages caused overloads and burnouts in some of his cerebral cortex in trying to deal with the shock of the heavy damage to his chassis)

Interesting.

One thing I do to note is: in the beginning paragraphs of your fic there are commas within your quotation sentences, many of which you don't need. Also, whenever people's thoughts are represented as italicized.

My two cents.


On the flip side, I liked the memory errors that you placed throughout the story, since it touches the aspect of Kup's advanced age really well. I'm glad you touched on the mirror universe of G1.

That was one thing I was actually unsure about. With a lot of those I tried to bridge the dialogue if it was interrupted by an action or something, but it ended up looking a little messy. I went back and fixed that up a little.

If anybody else has suggestions or constructive criticism, let me know.


Thanks. I really liked writing this, I love the Shattered Glass fiction.

The SG universe creeps me the hug out. Wheeljack, in this? Delightfully creepy.

I like the memory errors as well, and I like the idea that it isn't just his age but the upgrading, too, that could have caused it.